Friday, July 8, 2011

Reflections from the waiting room

Over the last 10 months I have spent countless minutes (hours!) in the lobby of my fertility clinic. I say hi to the front desk receptionist, sign in and then wait to be called back. Some days I read a magazine while I wait. Other days I choose to text message my mom or add notes to my never ending to do list. Yet today was different. I guess my mind was in a different place all together. I signed in, plopped myself down on the couch and began to look around. As I began to look around, wonder & amazement filled my mind. The clinic was especially busy today and many others were also waiting. Infertility is all around us. Really it is. Until I began this process I never truly grasped just how many couples face infertility challenges. Infertility is not limited to a certain race, ethnicity, body size, body shape, religion or economic status. Infertility has no bounds. In a way this realization provides me with both comfort and heartache. Comfort to know that I am not alone in this struggle, yet sadness that so many are desperately longing and pleading for the chance to bring life into this world. 


I was in my daze when I heard the following from said receptionist "Congratulations!" A young woman approached the front desk with a huge silly grin plastered across her face. "Thank you, we are so excited" she replied. She is pregnant. At that moment I literally wanted to run up and throw my arms around her neck in celebration. I wanted her to know that despite not being there myself, I am genuinely happy for her. I wanted her to know that God has a wonderful plan for her life and the precious new life inside of her. I wanted to ask her a million questions (how long has she been trying, how many cycles did it take, what all did she try, etc). But I didn't. I didn't at the risk of looking like a crazy person. I mean come on, I don't even know this girl. But in that moment I didn't care. I just wanted to celebrate with her & share in her joy. So (instead of looking like a crazy person) I looked straight at her, smiled a bigger than average smile, whispered "congrats" and prayed for her & her future family. While I do not know her personally I know that she deserves this chance. The chance to be a great mother.  The chance to share the Lord with her child (I hope). The chance to start a legacy. My heart remains full of joy for this mystery woman; Hours have passed and I am still smiling. 


James 1:17 "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created." 

5 comments

  1. AnonymousJuly 11, 2011

    This post really shows your heart. You are rejoicing with someone who is rejoicing, not coveting what she has. We continue to pray that God blesses you with pregnancy soon. We look forward to smiling a bigger than average smile with you too!

    K

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  2. AnonymousJuly 11, 2011

    This actually brought tears to my eyes. I had to stop to get a Kleenex before I could finish reading and post a comment. Your infertility is similar to many others yet unique. I believe this struggle is preparing you to be even greater parents than the average couple because you desire it so much. You will develop an even closer, prayerful relationship with Brandon and together you can put your whole faith in God as He leads you through this chapter of your lives.

    We love you,
    Debbie and Jack

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  3. AnonymousJuly 13, 2011

    just got teary reading this! i love you and love your heart sweet britt! praying so fervently for you guys with faith in our God who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine according to HIS power that IS AT WORK WITHIN US! To HIM be the glory!!!

    Jamie

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  4. Hi! Ok so I work with your father-in-law and I think he mentioned that he was going to pass your blog along to me. This is just the 2nd or 3rd post I've read but just wanted to let you know how encouraged I am by it already. I have been struggling big time with jealousy of other people who are overcoming infertility and getting pregnant while we are still seemingly at square one, and I am convicted by the joy that you are experiencing for people even in your own pain. So thank you for that reminder! Here's to hoping the receptionist will be congratulating YOU one day soon :) And in case you ever want to swap stories, feel free to e-mail me - amandajoiner@gmail.com

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  5. Hey Amanda, Thanks for saying hello. I would love to email you and swap stories. Talk to you soon! :)

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