|Not the actual issue I picked up, but you get the idea.|
I suppose you need a little bit of history to understand the incredible impact of my discovery. When I was deeply struggling with my ED I thrived on the content of health and fitness magazines. I craved them really, as sad as that sounds as I sit here and type. I would read them cover to cover, and take mental notes of each and every tip learning how to eat leaner, work out harder, and shed those extra unwanted pounds. I was obsessed to put it bluntly. I discarded this obsession as me simply trying to be "healthy." I would reason that "healthy" isn't a shameful goal, so obviously there was nothing wrong with my worshiping of said magazines. Ironically, the more I read the more unhealthy I became.
Once I was on the road to recovery my relationship with the health and fitness magazines was one of the first things to go. I knew that in order to get better I needed to fill my mind with other thoughts and images. So I threw out all the magazines in the house and unsubscribed from email newsletters with like messages. I was even careful not to pick one up to simply browse while standing in line at the grocery store check out. Go big or go home.
So back to my plane ride last week. I picked up a recent Self Magazine issue, not in an obsessive way, but just in hopes to make the 6 hour trek home a little more bearable. As I flipped the pages I found myself skipping article after article. Read a few lines, flip the page and repeat. Why? Not because I was making a cognizant effort to block the images from my mind but because I was B.O.R.E.D. I'm talking totally bored out of my mind. I didn't care two cents about how to get a tighter stomach, booty or abs all while eating the most bang for your buck. So after about five minutes, once I put the magazine in the seat pocket in front of me, it hit me.
My perspective has changed in a BIG way. My old thoughts and obsessions have now been replaced with something real and something truly healthy. My Creator. I know, without a doubt, that He was smiling with me as I tossed the magazine in the garbage without so much as a blink of an eye.
I was once lost but He rescued me from my dark place. He has matured my heart, mind and spirit and I am a new person. My perspective has shifted, for the better.
In what area of life have you experienced a shift in perspective? Can you relate?
I would love to hear!
Note - In no way I am claiming Self, or any like magazine, to be a poor source of information for all people. It certainly does contain positive messages about overall wellness. I am simply describing a portion of my journey w/ ED and how, through recovery, my overall views & habits have changed.