NEDAwareness Week 2014. . . a few midweek resources

To continue highlighting NEDAwareness Week, I thought I'd link up to a few resources I have seen around the web/social media/tv the last few days. Enjoy!

On Monday, the TODAY Show kicked off a "Love Your Selfie" Campaign that is running all week. The nine perky hosts of the TODAY show told viewers about their physical insecurities and appeared on live TV without makeup as part of their “Love Your Selfie” campaign Monday. But for all they criticized about themselves, they sure love taking selfies. All nine hosts snapped pictures of themselves as part of the campaign to spread awareness about self-image. Source. Read more: Today Show Hosts Love Selfies, Hate Selves | TIME.com http://healthland.time.com/2014/02/25/today-show-no-makeup-selfies/#ixzz2uQY8DWzE

Dad's letter to daughter: Forget makeup; your beauty is inside

I am worthy - By Katie Clemons via The Art of Simple

I Had No Idea - Allison (short clip speaking to Eating Disorders and Infertility)

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NEDAwareness Week 2014

This week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. 

February 23 - March 1, 2014

What is NEDAwareness Week?

NEDAwareness Week is a collective effort of volunteers, including eating disorder professionals, health care providers, students, educators, social workers, organizations and individuals committed to raising awareness of eating disorders.  The impact of increased outreach efforts leads to a greater chance of people seeking out resources and help for an eating disorder, which ultimately saves lives.

What are the Key Messages of NEDAwareness Week?

This year the National Eating Disorders Association is stressing the need to address eating disorder misconceptions - as many individuals, families, and communities are not aware of the often devastating mental and physical consequences - and highlights available resources for treatment and support. We urge you to talk about the pressures, attitudes and behaviors that shape these disorders with your family, friends, colleagues and community by doing just one thing during NEDAwareness Week. Learn more about the key messages for 2014 NEDAwareness Week and share with others so they can get in the know! source

Theme this year: "I had no idea"

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Click here to find an event in your community and to learn how you can get involved this week!

Or click here for a few FAQ.  

Also, Notorious ED blogger, Carrie Arnold, will be posting a little series this week on her blog, and I encourage you to check it out. 

I hope you will take the time to attend an event in your home town, or if nothing else, take a few seconds to read up on relevant ED information. There is always more to learn. And the more we learn, the more impact we will have, and the more impact we have, the better chance we have of ridding someone of this awful disease. Or better yet. . . preventing it. 

On pregnancy weight gain & an ED past

I have had several women email and ask specifically how I was able to healthfully deal with the weight gain that comes with not only one, but now two, pregnancies. I have hesitated writing on this topic because honestly, it really was a non issue for me. And for that I am beyond thankful.

I know this is not the case for many women who are in recovery, or even for those who consider themselves "fully recovered."

During the time spent in therapy, while simultaneously pursuing fertility treatments to get pregnant the first time around, this very topic is something my therapist and I discussed and worked on, in order to mentally prepare for what would come in the form of extra pounds.

Because let's face it. . . for someone who had worked SO, SO HARD to gain a significant amount of weight, the thought of adding on an additional 25-30+ pounds on top of an already established healthy goal weight, can be downright scary. Terrifying actually.

Thus. . . prep work was needed.

And it worked. No doubt. When I got pregnant with Clara, and Camille for that matter, I was at a normal BMI based on the chart below. And for both pregnancies, without being overly restrictive or overly indulgent, I gained right around 30 pounds each time.

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My therapist helped me shift my mindset and thus my mental focus during those nine months was WHERE the pounds were going. I was not gaining weight because my diet was spiraling out of control. I was gaining weight because I was growing a baby. A human being was depending on me to grow, thrive and survive. And with that in mind, I knew I needed to give it my best effort. 

Pregnancy weight gain does not = I am getting fat. 

Pregnancy weight gain = I am using my body, that God has entrusted me with, to provide proper nourishment to this teeny tiny baby. This teeny tiny baby that is depending on ME, each and every day of pregnancy, to ultimately make an appearance in this world. 

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We also walked through charts like the one above, to see just how the pounds break down during a pregnancy. 

So while this sounds short and sweet, I know in reality, it is not a short and sweet process.

It takes time.

It takes work.

It takes a lot of mental preparation. A lot. 

And for some, like myself, it takes months of assistance from a therapist who can help work towards a healthy mindset of pregnancy weight gain. So that when a pregnancy does occur, the foundation has been laid, and instead of fretting each and every pound that creeps on, one can sit back and enjoy the wonder of a changing body and the growing of a human life.

Has anyone had experience with this? Did you struggle mentally and/or emotionally when gaining weight during pregnancy? What helped? What didn't? Please share. 

Fear foods

Disclaimer: ED's are vast and complex, and cannot be summed up in cookie cutter fashion. Everyones story and experiences are different. While most who struggle with anorexia struggle greatly with the concept of fear foods, the information and ideas presented below are based on my story and my experience. 

FEAR FOODS

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Eating disorder patients often have a conviction and morbid fear that types or amounts of food will lead to instant and discernable weight gain. These may include any high-calorie items or groups of food such as fats, "junk food", or meat. Treatment aims to reintegrate these foods into the diet of the sufferer either gradually or, in the case of Maudsley/FBT, almost immediately. An integral part of the recovery process is developing a healthy relationship with food, eating and one's body; and this includes viewing food as neutral and fuel, not good or bad, safe or unsafe. (source)

When I was in the depths of my ED I had a fear food list that strung a mile long. 

Make that two miles long. 

To name a few: pizza, chips, ice cream, cookies/cakes/brownies/candy or basically any and all desserts, bread (unless it was the 40 cal/slice variety. . . gag me), cream based sauces and rich pastas, any drink that contained calories, french fries, high calorie salad dressing, donuts/cinnamon rolls etc, pancakes, hotdogs, bacon, mayo, certain Mexican food dishes such as Enchiladas, Lasagna, nachos, milk that was not skim, and basically any restaurant entree of which I was not able to scour the menu/calorie count prior to ordering... I think you get the idea. 

To someone who has never had an ED this concept might seem totally bizarre, but let me assure you foods such as these really do/can induce well. . . FEAR. Fear foods are REAL. 

When I first began recovery the thought of eating some of these foods made me want to cry and hide. And I did cry and hide. And I got mad. Many times. (Brandon had to leave me alone in front of the milk section at the store once. Because I could not bring myself to grab the 2% milk that my nutritionist was asking me to start drinking. . . true story. . . took me about 20 minutes to actually put the silly milk in my basket). But I knew I had to do it or else I would never have a healthy relationship with food ever again. 

I had to come to terms with the truth that there is no such thing as a GOOD or BAD food. I truly believe & embrace this concept now, but back then, not so much.

Yes, I understand and agree that there are healthy and unhealthy options, and none of us can/should eat anything and everything we want with abandon and keep our bodies strong and disease free, but for someone with an ED, eating well and having a normal relationship with food is about taking away negative food labels, and understanding that eating some french fries at lunch does not equal an automatic 25 lb weight gain. Eating well is about moderation, which for me means eating nachos one day is ok, and eating veggies and steamed chicken the next day is ok too. Moderation is the name of the game.

So for those of you who are working towards eating your fear foods again, here are a few things that worked for me. . . 

One fear food at a time - Incorporate one fear food at a time, not several at once. If you take on too much from the start, I guarantee you will get overwhelmed and give up. It's ok if it takes you a month to learn how to eat Bluebell again without having a panic attack. Once you get the Bluebell down, then pick another food from your list and start again.

And eat that fear food, in a small portion, at least twice a week - This is what my nutritionist and therapist suggested and it worked well for me. Don't go for 3 slices of pizza, just make it a goal to eat one slice, at least two times in one week. It's easier to desensitize yourself when what you're working with seems a bit more managable (vs. eating three slices of pizza every day for a week).

Accountability - Choose an accountability person that will ONLY encourage you. This is not the time for lectures or intensive questioning or guilt trips. You need someone who will sit there with you, as patient as can be, even if it takes two hours to finish a scary meal. 

Reward yourself - Come up with some type of reward system and celebrate your success. Every time I conquered one of my fear foods I treated myself to a manicure. :)

Two steps forward, one step back - Understand that set backs are part of the process. This is just the nature of recovery. There are still days (although praise God they are few and far between now) when I eat something that triggers some feelings of guilt and fear. It happens. It is normal. Don't expect perfection now or even years into your recovery. 

Your turn. . . What about you? Have you ever struggled with fear foods? If so, what helped you conquor your list? I'd love to hear from you! 

Have a great Monday! 

Life With An Eating Disorder: Resources

Happy Friday! Today marks the last day in the series. While some of the testimonials may have been hard or uncomfortable to read, I hope that the words shared spoke some truth, hope, and perhaps gave you new insight into the world that is eating disorders.

To wrap things up I want to leave you with some hands on resources, should you or someone you love need them in the future. In no way does the list below encompass all the great information out there, there are so many more websites and books, but at least it will give you a start.

Recovery/Research focused blogs
ED Bites
Science of Eating Disorders 
Living With Food: Cleveland Center for Eating Disorders 
Kartini Clinic for Eating Disorders
Binge Eating and Bulimia: The latest psychological research on eating disorders  
Something Fishy: Website on eating disorders
Eating Disorder HOPE 
Mirror Mirror
The Recovery Boat
Blog Roll from Surviving Anorexia

Recovery/Research focused books (taken directly from Surviving Anorexia)

Eating Disorder Information
Anorexia Nervosa: A Survival Guide for Families, Friends, and Sufferers by Janet Treasure

Answers to Anorexia: A Breakthrough Nutritional Treatment That Is Saving Lives by James M Greenblatt

Bulimia: A Guide for Friends & Family by Roberta Trattner Sherman, PhD., and Ron A Thompson, PhD.

Eating Disorders: The facts by Abraham and Llewellyn-Jones

Help Your Teenager Beat an Eating Disorder by Locke and Grange

Eating Disorders: The Path to Recovery by Kate Middleton

First Steps out of an Eating Disorder by Middleton and Smith

Overcoming Anorexia Nervosa: A self-help guide using Cognitive Behaviour Techniques by Christopher Freeman

Overcoming Binge Eating by Christopher Freeman

Eating Disorders Psychological Issues/Self Help

Healing your Hungry Heart by Joanna Poppink

Hope, Help and Healing for Eating Disorders by Gregory Jantz

Father Hunger: Fathers, Daughters and the Pursuit of Thinness (2nd Ed) by Margo Maine PhD

Navigating Teen Depression by Gordon Parker and Kerrie Eyers

Overcoming Anorexia Nervosa: A self-help guide using Cognitive Behaviour Techniques by Christopher Freeman

Reviving Ophelia by Mary Piper

The Body Betrayed by Kathryn J Zerbe

The Secret Language of Eating Disorders by Peggy Claude-Pierre

Maudsley Approach

Skills-based Learning for Caring for a Loved One with an Eating Disorder: The New Maudsley Method by Janet Treasure

My Kid is Back: Empowering parents to beat AN by June Alexander

Brave Girl Eating by Harriet Brown

Compulsive, Comfort or Emotional Eating

Feeding the Hungry Heart by Geneen Roth

Appetites by Geneen Roth

When Food is Love by Geneen Roth

Memoirs, Life & Recovery Stories

Appetite for Life: Inspiring Stories of Recovery by Margie Ryerson

Biting Anorexia by Lucy Howard Taylor

Gaining by Aimee Liu

Goodbye Ed, Hello Me: Recover from Your Eating Disorder and Fall in Love with Lifeby Jenni Schaefer

Just Tell Her to Stop: Family stories of eating disorders by Becky Henry

Life without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too by Jenni Schaefer

Mealtimes and Milestones by Constance Barter

Perfect by Emily Halban

Restoring our bodies, reclaiming our lives by Aimee Liu

Thin by Grace Bowman

Unbearable Lightness: A Story Of Loss And Gain by Porta de Rossi

Wasted by Marya Hornbacher

Depression

The books below are what spoke to me when learning how to deal and live with my depression. There are so many, many books on depression, that you will certainly be able to find some that speak directly to you. Some of my best finds were in second hand shops.

Living with a Black Dog, books I and II by Matthew Johnstone

Depression, Lifting the Cloud by Dr Christine Reed and Dr Lisa Lampe

Depression, The Way out of your Prison by Dorothy Rowe

Shoot the Damn Dog by Sally Brampton

Healing Path by Dan Allender PhD

The One Year Book of Hope by Nancy Cuthrie

Hope in the Midst of Depression by Mary Southerland

The Shelter of Each Other by Mary Piper

Do You Think I am Beautiful; When Wallflowers Dance; A Beautiful Offering – all by Angela Thomas

Resilience by Elizabeth Edwards

A Women’s Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden

A Confident Woman by Ingrid Trobisch

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